A boy with a hat

**Miss CoCo** · #1 04-13-2012, 02:48 PM

peace on you frinds
as usual ..this is brand new writing
not too evil

for light of dawn sake
she seems too kind to frighten her with evil
so ..lets begin
.......................

.......................

To sing that song ..

You won't take long

It's a song of a tale

Maybe true ..or wrong

About that rose

That evil rose

What a cold heart

No warm she shows

Her maid was a boy

He was wearing a hat

To hide his looks ..to bury his heart

Our evil princess

Used to call him the rat

One day in the castle

In that fancy room

((remove that ..dirty hunts

Away ..a way

Is that’s a beautiful scene ..to start a day ))

our rat was there

((what a magical eyes

What a charming bloom ))

Just when she walked a way

They start the doom

Now tell me your opinion on all of that

You need to know ..there was a boy with hat

…………………

Days and days

What's the rule she plays

That beautiful rich

That evil beast ..which is which

The people bored

No more patience to hold

The castle was destroyed

And she was there

In the lock of regret

Among that ugly walls

Dark and wet

Chained by blood and crimes

But there was a choice

From a voice

She used to ignore

All these times

Here come the spring

The bells will ring

A after the devil will killed

Again we will build

Did you hear all that

My point is ..there was a boy with a hat

……………..

Years and years

But with out change

The same darkness

with different age

there was whisper

From ear to ear

of course all of us

had to share

((they killed a person

Wasn't there aim

Can that be true

There wasn't some one

Looks the same

And every one

Said there was a ghost

Every day ..walks on the cost

What doesi t look for

Just for more

I don,t want ..who was wrong or right

His only goal ..to see her smiles

Its pleasure his soul ..close up the miles

That tale of the winter's fire

About the sad ...love and desire

I don't want ..who was wrong or right

The important thing ..we will take in sight

That boy was missing …that boy with the hat

an that,s all

I hope you liked it

see ya

التوقيع :

coco is here

التعديل الأخير تم بواسطة Miss CoCo ; 04-13-2012 الساعة 09:45 PM

**A H M E A D** · 04-13-2012, 02:58 PM

Welcome my sister
How are you?
I hope you're in good mood
Let's start

I liked the beginning a lot because
it gave a good introduction to the poem
The boy description was perfect

The girl was exploitative

But it seems that the boy was trying to satisfy her
selfishness
The end of the poem were not the beautiful as
the beginning of the poem

I'm sorry
I wished that you're good mood for my opinion
Hahahahaha
I think the boy has served this girl
until the end
Great poem
God bless you my sister

Bye

**تيماري ساما** · 04-13-2012, 03:03 PM

thank you very much my dear

Days and days
What's the rule she plays
That beautiful rich
That evil beast ..which is which
The people bored
No more patience to hold
The castle was destroyed
And she was there
In the lock of regret
Among that ugly walls

very butiful poem
very butiful words
we weating your new
se you

**ضوء الفجر** · 04-13-2012, 03:10 PM

وعليكم السلام ورحمة الله ..

ماشاء الله تبارك الرحمن .. وانا اللي قلت لازم لي اول رد .. XPP
خيو احمد ..

im kidding .. منووورة الصفحة خيو ..^^
..
الموضوع ما ينفع اعلق عليه بكلمتين .. ابدااا
لي عودة ... ... >> >

baaack
welcome sis ..
after i read this topic .. i wonder... how you get all of this evill
XDD
masha allah on your Imagination
how wonderful .. how scare ..
is it enough to describe it
but wait there is more .. let me see
mmm.. all of what you wrote .. i liked it
from the first letter to the last lettrs
but what interesting me .. more than any thing..
when you described the well .. blood .. wet and dark and so on
its really whats surprised me
masha allah on you
^^
and what else ..
the last chapter ..
really i want to response on word word .. but i think this will annoyed you ><
ماشاء الله .. كان شامل و مكمل لكل اللي قلتيه
واكثر جزء شرير ومرعب كان هو
لو كل شي يعيد ويزيد .. القلعة ترجع تنبني .. وضاحايا ثانين يجو .. >> what the ....
but its too much
اعتقد اني استمتعت اكثر شي بهذا الجزء
sooooo beautiful.. sooo evil
^^

mmmm...
with that .. i knew he was kindlly .. cause.. as you said
His only goal ..to see her smiles
after all..i think i can forgive him
and with smile too
i felt by his kindness from this sentence
><
حبيت الولد كثير .. تسالت عن سبب وجوده في البداية
واكتشفت ان ما كان حيمشي شي بدونه .. ^^
يا اااااخ..
i liked this boy
^^
i want to complite ..really i enjoyed .. a lot a lot a lot
but .. اعتقد اني طولت كفاية ><
thanks a lot sis coc
^^
ايش العقل الشرير اللي مخبيته خيتو ..
حبيت الفكرة كثير خيتو .. الف شكر لابداعك
حماكي المولى ورعاكي
انتظر جديدك بفارغ الصبر

**A H M E A D** · 04-13-2012, 08:10 PM

[QUOTE=ضوء الفجر;726218]

وعليكم السلام ورحمة الله ..

ماشاء الله تبارك الرحمن .. وانا اللي قلت لازم لي اول رد .. XPP
خيو احمد ..

im kidding .. منووورة الصفحة خيو ..^^

I'm sorry my sister
Hahahahaha
You are the first no doubt
And
Your comment is the most beautiful
Wait for your comment on the poem
God bless you

**ضوء الفجر** · 04-15-2012, 02:56 PM

تم فك الحجز .. ^^

QUOTE] I'm sorry my sister
Hahahahaha
You are the first no doubt
And
Your comment is the most beautiful
Wait for your comment on the poem
God bless you

[/QUOTE]

haha.. لا ماينفع خلاص ..

جاري وضعك في القائمة السوداء ..
im kidding bro
^^
thanks a lot
بالعكس خيو .. ماشاء الله انت من الاعضاء المميزين اللي استنى ردودهم
والجميع يشهد لك بتميزك وردودك الجميلة والداعمة
بارك الله فيك
^^

**Miss CoCo** · 04-16-2012, 02:52 PM

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة A H M E A D

Welcome my sister

How are you?
welcome bro
glad to see you

I hope you're in good mood
Let's start
hhhhhh...yes yes the mood is fine
I liked the beginning a lot because

it gave a good introduction to the poem
The boy description was perfect
glad to know that ...i thougt that the beginning wasthe weakest part
The girl was exploitative
why ..the boy do that ..she didn,t force him to
But it seems that the boy was trying to satisfy her
selfishness
The end of the poem were not the beautiful as
the beginning of the poem
I'm sorry
hhhhhh..no need to apologaize .. just wait and see how i, look when some one opposite my opinion..just kidding
I wished that you're good mood for my opinion
Hahahahaha
I think the boy has served this girl
until the end
Great poem
God bless you my sister

and you too bro ..you too

Bye

see ya

**Miss CoCo** · 04-16-2012, 03:01 PM

المشاركة الأصلية كتبت بواسطة ضوء الفجر

وعليكم السلام ورحمة الله ..

ماشاء الله تبارك الرحمن .. وانا اللي قلت لازم لي اول رد .. XPP
خيو احمد ..

im kidding .. منووورة الصفحة خيو ..^^
..
الموضوع ما ينفع اعلق عليه بكلمتين .. ابدااا
لي عودة ... ... >> >

baaack
welcome sis ..
wekcome sis ..nice to see you here
after i read this topic .. i wonder... how you get all of this evill
XDD

it wasn,t that evil
masha allah on your Imagination
how wonderful .. how scare ..
is it enough to describe it
but wait there is more .. let me see
mmm.. all of what you wrote .. i liked it
that,s from your kindness

from the first letter to the last lettrs
but what interesting me .. more than any thing..
when you described the well .. blood .. wet and dark and so on
its really whats surprised me
masha allah on you
^^
and what else ..
the last chapter ..
really i want to response on word word .. but i think this will annoyed you ><
ماشاء الله .. كان شامل و مكمل لكل اللي قلتيه
واكثر جزء شرير ومرعب كان هو
لو كل شي يعيد ويزيد .. القلعة ترجع تنبني .. وضاحايا ثانين يجو .. >> what the ....
but its too much
اعتقد اني استمتعت اكثر شي بهذا الجزء
sooooo beautiful.. sooo evil
^^

mmmm...
with that .. i knew he was kindlly .. cause.. as you said
His only goal ..to see her smiles
after all..i think i can forgive him
and with smile too
i think he will be glad to know that
i felt by his kindness from this sentence
><
حبيت الولد كثير .. تسالت عن سبب وجوده في البداية
واكتشفت ان ما كان حيمشي شي بدونه .. ^^
كيف اشكرك يا اااااخ..
i liked this boy
^^
sure you have to like him
he gave her life for the person he loved

i want to complite ..really i enjoyed .. a lot a lot a lot
but .. اعتقد اني طولت كفاية ><
thanks a lot sis coc
^^
ايش العقل الشرير اللي مخبيته خيتو ..
حبيت الفكرة كثير خيتو .. الف شكر لابداعك
حماكي المولى ورعاكي

انتظر جديدك بفارغ الصبر

ما بعرف كيف اشكرك على ذوقك
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